Warning: The following description of a date is true. Only the guy’s name was changed… to protect… well, just read on:

So, some of you know that the DJ called me on Monday and asked me out. Which was a good thing. He called me Tuesday to confirm the date. (We hadn’t really decided anything on Monday other than we wanted to see each other in the daylight, lol.) We agreed on Thursday after I got off work: he’d drive into Old Town,we’d meet around six, we’d walk around, we’d have dinner. Simple, right? While I was quite flattered that he seemed so excited to see me, there was something… off about it all. Remind me next time to trust my first instinct.

First off, he was an hour late – he was caught in traffic going into Old Town. While I can understand that, I think he should have allowed for more time to get into town. (Maybe that’s just me?) When he walked up, things were definitely good. He had the great smile that I remembered from Friday and he was definitely as cute. He greeted me with "you look better than I remember – especially with the daylight!" A compliment is always a good way to start. 🙂

We end up walking down towards the water and end up at a relatively nice restaurant (I didn’t pick it, he did) when he says he’s got to ask a favor of me: apparently he’s somewhat strapped for cash this week and wants to know if I can help out with covering the dinner. At least he was upfront about it before we went in, right? A bit tacky, but no biggie. I think "so it’ll be a dutch date. I haven’t been on one of those in awhile." We sit, order drinks and food and continue our getting-to-know-you conversation. Being in a restaurant, we start talking about the food we will and won’t eat… he goes into a very graphic description of why he won’t eat crab or mackerel. (Note to anyone who might go on a date and needs conversational points: do not talk about puking – even if you’re not eating yet. Or which seafood you won’t eat when we’re in a seafood restaurant. I’m just sayin’.)

Dinner wasn’t too bad, actually it was delicious, but the conversation kept stalling, which wasn’t bad b/c that gave me a chance to look at him. (I’ve come to the conclusion that he looks a lot like that actor that played Berger – who I thought was cute – on Sex and the City, but bald.) So I switch the topic to music, which he really got into. We sit around there for a long time until I hint to him that they might want their table back.

We head back up King St and end up walking around for an hour and a half. (I might want to add here that I looked damn cute – but I was not wearing walking shoes… at least not for walking a couple miles. Heeled boots = aching feet.) We talked about ambitions, dreams, stuff like that (he told me that I remind him of some "really pretty actress" that he couldn’t remember the name of) – then we walk by a bookstore I haven’t noticed before. I mention that I love books and all my money go to books and yarn. We start talking about books – I tell him that lately I’ve been on a history/biography kick. He’s all excited about that and says he reads a lot of history too, so I start to tell him about the bio of Queen Elizabeth I that I’m reading and how it covers the first years of her reign. He interrupts me by asking if that "was the queen who died while fucking a horse." I kind of stop short and say no, he’s referring to the rumors surrounding Catherine the Great – of Russia – and I’m reading about Elizabeth I – of England. So he’s like, "oh, like Lady Godiva?" I say that they are from the same country and start to talk about the legend surrounding her famous ride. He was quite taken with the fact that she rode a horse naked and that her husband must have been cool to let her do that. He asked when that happened, I tell him that I don’t know off hand, but I thought it was the 1400’s or 1500’s. He looked at me and asked if I was sure, b/c he thought it had happened in the 60’s. The 1960’s.

That’s when I knew that without a doubt, I couldn’t date him. I’ve always said that if I had a pretty boy to look at, he wouldn’t need to be smart or even talk – I was wrong. I cannot date an idiot. (I know, that was harsh… but hey, the date just happened!) It probably would have gone better had he not talked. (During this, he needed to stop and use the restroom so while he was in there I texted Lara with three words: "This is bad…" lmao!) So, I end up steering him back towards my work, b/c that’s where I’ve parked, we continue to talk for a bit… and then he goes in for the kiss. EEK! What to do? I turned it into a hug and he keeps hugging and tries again to kiss me. I turned my head. I know, kinda rude, right? I told him that I was tired and heading home – and thanks for dinner and the walk. Oh yeah, and to drive home safely. (I had to walk down a dark alley – and I didn’t want him walking me down there… LOL!) He asked if he could call, and what could I do? I said yes (I was thinking is there anything that I could say at that moment that would make him not call…) and repeated my goodnight. 

Once I got in the car, I texted Lara back and immediately called Dani to rehash. Much groaning and laughing was had. I’ve come to the conclusion that he’s a really nice guy who seems to really like me, but he’s not for me… even if he does look like Ron Livingston. Now, how to let him down gently? Suggestions, anyone?

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